Focused-Activity Networking
Build deeper relationships through three to four hours of shared activity.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~days to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 94%
Focused-Activity Networking prioritizes relationship depth over contact volume. Invite one person to spend roughly three to four hours doing something both participants enjoy, such as golf, poker, a walk, or another low-pressure activity. The activity creates natural pauses and shared experience, while the extended duration allows conversation to move beyond introductions into problems, ideas, values, and potential collaboration. Because attention is not fragmented across a crowd, participants can understand each other more fully and generate concrete possibilities together. The approach is especially useful for people who find conventional event networking shallow or draining. Its effectiveness depends on mutual interest, clear boundaries, and genuine curiosity rather than disguising a sales meeting as recreation.
Origin
Extracted from Marketing Against The Grain after Kipp Bodnar reflected on a long one-on-one golf session with marketer Dave Gerhardt.
Core principles
- 01Relationship depth requires uninterrupted time.
- 02Shared activity reduces the pressure of formal conversation.
- 03A few deep interactions can outperform many brief encounters.
How to run it
- 1
Choose for Depth
Select someone where deeper mutual understanding could create learning, trust, friendship, or collaboration.
Pro tip Prioritize genuine compatibility and mutual relevance over status.
Watch out Do not use the invitation to manufacture access to someone who has shown no interest.
- 2
Design Shared Time
Choose a comfortable activity and reserve three to four hours with minimal interruption.
Pro tip Pick an activity that permits conversation without requiring constant concentration.
Watch out Respect accessibility, cost, safety, and personal-boundary constraints.
- 3
Let the Conversation Deepen
Move naturally among personal context, professional challenges, ideas, and opportunities without forcing an agenda.
Pro tip Bring a few thoughtful questions but remain responsive to what emerges.
Watch out Turning the activity into a prolonged pitch destroys the relational advantage.
- 4
Act on the Output
Follow up on introductions, experiments, or collaborative ideas developed during the time together.
Pro tip Send a concise note naming the most useful shared insight and next action.
Watch out Failing to follow through makes even a strong interaction transient.
In the wild
Two marketing peers play golf one-on-one for several hours. The shared activity gives them enough uninterrupted time to discuss their work deeply, generate the concept for a YouTube show, and explore broader problems without the fragmentation of a conference reception.
→ They leave with a stronger relationship and concrete collaborative ideas.
Common mistakes
Optimizing for Contact Count
Meeting many people briefly can produce a large network with little trust or useful mutual understanding.
Forcing a Business Agenda
The shared activity works because conversation can develop naturally rather than becoming a disguised sales meeting.
Is it for you?
Best for
Professionals who dislike large networking events or need a deeper relationship with a specific peer or collaborator.
Not ideal for
Initial meetings where safety, power dynamics, or professional boundaries make extended one-on-one time inappropriate.
From the transcript
“The most underrated form of networking in the world is three to four hours one-on-one in person with someone.”
“the actual hack in all of this is to spend three to four hours one-on-one with somebody and deeply, deeply know them.”
“And you could only do that because of that type of focus in that type of situation.”
From the episode
How To Stand Out As A Marketer In 2024 (Even On A Small Budget)